It’s christmas day, just like last year and also the year before that.
Once again, I’ll say: I’m not religious but I’ve always celebrated christmas, and it feels as good a time as any to wish for peace. Though my faith in wishes continues to diminish to even lower than what it once was.
Many things have happened in my life this year. One of my main learnings was that things don’t happen unless you make them happen. Whether I’m at work or at home or somewhere else, sometimes you [just] gotta “do it”, and that’s hard.
But how do you “do it” if the thing you want to do involves unknown work? The problem with peace is not that people don’t want it, although many don’t. But rather, I’d say: There are many many people who do want peace on earth and are doing things / taking steps towards trying to make that become a reality. The problem is that no one has figured out “how” to “do it” yet. Or at the very least, “doing it” takes a very very long time.
Yet here I sit in London with piles of privilege in a mostly heated, mostly standing building. I’m in prime position to help! I have a platform and I have spare time. I have (some) fortunes to spare. I have freedom.
So what do I do?
Well, what have I done?
Decision paralysis can be a convenient excuse for people in my position. “Oh it’s simply too hard to tell what will actually have an impact!” and “Oh doing [X] is actually less effective than people think and I am very smart!” are two statements that I’m sick of hearing.
Here we sit with piles of privilege, playing “peace” as if it’s a board game, saying “If we are to find peace, then we ought to do it in the most calculated and elegant way possible” as if it weren’t a scramble / as if humanity wasn’t treading water in an increasingly boiling ocean (oh yeah, that’s right: climate change is happening too).
It’s time to panic, motherfrogger! It’s time to make some noise! Cry out for help! Demand better! Demand better! It’s gonna get messy!!!!!!!
I’ve been theming my years since 2022!
Every year, I focus on one particular theme / one particular quality that I spend the whole year trying to explore and embody.
So I ought to know a lot about peace, now that we’re at the end. But unfortunately, I don’t.
What I do know is this: Forget about peace on earth. Finding peace for [just] one person has been hard enough. Creating peace, or at least, attempting to create peace in my own life has been an eye-opening experience for me.
It often means: Giving that whole-hearted apology earlier than you need to. It means surrendering some part of yourself when there’s a conflict: It means letting go of your pride. Or your rewards. Peace means letting someone else claim them instead. Yes, peace means walking away even if it means you end up losing something.
And peace means ego death: It means forgetting yourself and your needs (and everything you know). It means not needing anything / knowing you will rebuild from scratch if you have to. These are all things that bring you peace.
But we could fairly ask: Is peace always the right thing? If someone is mistreating you, or if someone is mistreating your friend, then peace is a vice. Sometimes you have to fight. Sometimes peace is wrong.
I now see that peace is a precious resource in my life. I spend it by fighting. I gain it by giving in, by taking the hit, by walking away. It goes up and down depending on what I do. Finding peace means finding a balance. What’s the right level of peace to aim for in your life?
In other words, pick your battles. Where and when and with whom are you going to fight? I am repeatedly shocked by some people’s inability to do this right, including my own.
Those of us aiming for world peace often end up fighting each other. I ask you: How on earth are we going to create peace on earth if we can’t even create peace in our own Signal chat? or in our creative community? or in our hometown?
Peace spreads! Unfortunately, conflict spreads quicker. Nine people at peace easily becomes ten. Nine people at war easily becomes ninety. These are the forces of nature that we have to contend with. It’s entropy, and we’re the information: Conflict is chaos and noise and nonsense. Peace is a delicate moving structure that requires work and effort and sacrifice.
But like I said, I know nothing about peace because it’s something I take for granted. Despite my complaints, I’m privileged enough to have it in abundance, yet still I wish for more, because wishes are cheap! They only cost thoughts, so I’ll keep wishing for peace at christmas for as long as I can think.
And fuck the evil nob-heads that make things worse!!!!!!!!
(amen)
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